Misdemeanor
17th June 2003, 09:47 AM
>
>Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the
>back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
>cigarettes at the front.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a
>DIET coke.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the
>counters.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive
>and put our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do we buy hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of
>eight.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
>have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
>talk to in the first place. !
>
>
>Only in Britain... are there handicapped parking places in front of a
>skating rink.
>
>
>3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
>
>
>142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
>
>
>58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
>screwdrivers.
>
>
>31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the
>fairy lights were plugged in.
>
>
>19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations
>were chocolate.
>
>
>British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling
>accidents.
>
>
>101 people since 1999 have had to have broken parts of plastic toys pulled
>out of the soles of their feet.
>
>
>18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
>cigarette in their mouth.
>
>
>A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two
years after opening
>bottles of beer with their teeth.
>
>
>5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control
>Scalextric cars.
>
>
>and finally ...
>
>
>in 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet!
>Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the
>back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy
>cigarettes at the front.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a
>DIET coke.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the
>counters.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive
>and put our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do we buy hot dogs in packs of ten and buns in packs of
>eight.
>
>
>Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then
>have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to
>talk to in the first place. !
>
>
>Only in Britain... are there handicapped parking places in front of a
>skating rink.
>
>
>3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
>
>
>142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
>
>
>58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
>screwdrivers.
>
>
>31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the
>fairy lights were plugged in.
>
>
>19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations
>were chocolate.
>
>
>British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling
>accidents.
>
>
>101 people since 1999 have had to have broken parts of plastic toys pulled
>out of the soles of their feet.
>
>
>18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit
>cigarette in their mouth.
>
>
>A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two
years after opening
>bottles of beer with their teeth.
>
>
>5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control
>Scalextric cars.
>
>
>and finally ...
>
>
>in 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet!